DEFINITION :: "The facade" :: The things I say instead of saying what is REALLY going on:
- Oh, yeah, I'm doing great.
- You know, things are busy.
- It just life with a baby...
- We are just figuring it out one day at a time.
- Everyday is an adjustment.
- Just learning to balance everything.
- I think I have it under control.
But what I'm really saying is;
- I'm so tired I can't even sleep!! Ugh!
- I really don't know how to ask for help. (Even if I did, what would I ask help for?!)
- Life is so chaotic that some days I just want to hide under my apron (if I wore one) & pretend I am invisible.
- I really have NO IDEA what I am doing.
- Everyday we are trying something new to make life work & nothing seems to help.
- There is no such thing as balance in my life right now! Some things just have to give.
But I am reassured that I am not the only new mom facing (or who has faced) moments, days and seasons such as this. I am blessed. I need to learn to be more transparent, be vulnerable, ask of help, accept help that is offered.
To be honest, most days I am not even sure how I feel. I chalk that up mostly to sleep deprivation. But one things is truer and than true...Jesus loves me and has called me into this season.
I am beyond blessed...
- by my husband who helps out so much and just knows when I need a surprise dozen roses or when to book a much needed massage (I can't wait until Saturday!! WOOHOO!!)
- by the smile on my daughter's face and her giggle when we cuddle in the morning.
- by my friends who offer to pray for me and who watch my daughter spur of the moment (shout-out to Courtney!! THANK YOU!!).
- by the comfort and hope given me through Jesus.
I need to tell myself: It is all worth it!
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