After three long months....it is finally over.
It is hard to imagine the number of keys and words my fingers have typed. The amount of emails exchanged back and forth. The time spent pouring over & reviewing submitted files, commenting on each.
The ideas that were changed, ideas that were formed, principles put into practice. Friendships that were made or reestablished.
We are all changed.
I am excited to announce that after three long months, FALL QUARTER IT FINALLY OVER!!
I will take a days break to rejoice in all the ideas and learning that was shared and exchanged...then...onto preparing winter quarter courses. My job is so fulfilling in the way that I have the opportunity to see lives transformed and ideas put into practice.
I am relieved to have a break but I am so thankful for the work I am allowed to do. :)
Until January.....
Monday, December 12, 2016
Friday, December 9, 2016
Life is Messy...and that is okay.
Life gets messy...
It does not mean that I live in a pigpen and things never get clean. It means I allow toys to be scattered on the floor throughout the day, picking up at the END of the day on most days instead of spending precious time picking them up and then picking up the same toys again... about 5 times a day. It means I teach and encourage my kids to clean up after themselves (and it works!!!! even at 11-months old!). I much rather spend time PLAYING with my kids rather than being their maid and always picking up after them.
It does not mean that flies are fluttering in my kitchen around the dirty dishes in the sink. It does mean that it might take a full 24-hours to unload the clean dishes, reload with the dirty ones and start the whole cycle over. For me, this is one of my most dreaded tasks...who knows why, but it is. Tag-teaming and communicating with my husband ensure that our sink is empty about 50% of the time during the week. Seriously, I much rather spend time with my kids playing than doing the dishes (and if my husband wants to do them...even better!)
It does not mean that mold and other undesirable "things" are growing in my bathroom. It means I wipe things as I go and about every month or so I do a deep clean of the bathroom. With potty training, blowout diapers and entering the muddy-outside weather, my bathrooms sees a lot of action. It is hard to keep them sparkling. I would literally have to spend at least an hour a day to keep them sparkling....sorry, not going to happen. But again, I assure you, are bathrooms are clean and they do get a deep scrub just not on the scale they use to. I much rather be spending time playing with my kids then on my pregnant hand and knees scrubbing the bathroom.
- toys scattered (and tripped over)
- piles of unclean clothes (that probably should have been washed WAY sooner)
- dirty dishes piled in the sink (because you are either too tired or too distracted to put the clean ones away)
- bathrooms are not sparkling clean
- papers piled up on the kitchen counter (but at least the bills are paid, right?)
- emails let unresponded to (the important one always get answered)
...yet it will all be okay.
Being currently sick and 17 weeks pregnant, already having a 2-year old and (almost) 1-year old, priorities change. I am resolved with the fact that life gets messy and that is okay.
I use to have such a high standard of "clean" and an even higher standard for communicating with the outside world, being over the top thoughtful...then I had kids. I realized that I can no longer do everything I once did...at least not to the standard I use to hold. I am sure that one day I will get back there but it is freeing in a sense to let go of these high standard and embrace this season on a messy life.
It does not mean that I have totally disregarded my responsibilities as an adult. On the contrary, I think I take my role as an adult more seriously now since I have two (well, three) creatures depending on me, a husband to love, an employer to fulfill my work obligation as well as my community/friends to connect with and serve. Life gets busy. The true priorities will also be taken care of with the right focus and heart. This may mean that piles of papers get unfiled and stacked on my kitchen counter for a week or two. I am okay with that.
So, here is the current view of my living room.
On most days it does not look like this but I must say we are making some great and fun memories among the mess. I love the saying, "Please excuse the mess. We are making memories here." Welcome to my new perpsective on life. As I continue to work on embracing this season of life, join me! It is more freeing than you think to let go of some of those high standards and ..... well..... just live!
On most days it does not look like this but I must say we are making some great and fun memories among the mess. I love the saying, "Please excuse the mess. We are making memories here." Welcome to my new perpsective on life. As I continue to work on embracing this season of life, join me! It is more freeing than you think to let go of some of those high standards and ..... well..... just live!
Pease be upon you.
~B~
Monday, December 5, 2016
Worry: Pregnancy: What if I start bleeding...again?
Worry: the practice of trying to change or control the future by thinking and rethinking, planning and over planning for an event that has not and may not occur. To dwell on an unpredictable event in the future.
That is my definition. Yes, I have been worried...somewhat secretly... about pregnancy #3.
It all stated with pregnancy #1...
Pregnancy #1
Outcome- successful: yet at week 15 I woke up to bloody sheets on a Tuesday morning. Initially I was in shock. I called my close friend and told her I would be a "little late" to bible study that morning because I had blood on my sheets and had to change the bedding. Then...it hit me. I was pregnant and bleeding. My husband, then in medical school, was up in Seattle without transportation because he took the commuter bus. I felt stuck. I called my mom; she rushed over and took me to the doctor and supported me during this crazy, crazy day. My husband finally found a way back home by our scheduled "emergency" ultrasound. I had placenta previa and was placed on modified bed rest for less than a week. My bleeding stopped soon after and the rest of my pregnancy was normal.
Pregnancy #2
Outcome-successful: yet at week 11.5, again on a Tuesday, I was at summer bible study. As I sat on the couch listening to the DVD on the book of Malachi, I felt like I was "leaking." I casually slide off the couch just a few minutes into the video and headed to the bathroom. It was a bloody mess! I was incredibly shocked to see that much blood. I froze. For sure I was having a miscarriage, I thought. As calmly as I could, I walked out, grabbed my phone without saying anything to the ladies in the room and headed back to the bathroom. They must have sensed something was wrong because my good friend, whose NEW leather couch I just bled all over, followed me back into the bathroom. Thankfully my husband was in town at the local dentist. I called the office and he rushed over in what felt like just minutes with new clothes, lots of pads and the direct route to the doctor's office. It felt like forever until we were called back. I explained the large amount of continual bleeding; and I was prepared in my heart that we lost our second child. The doctor placed the heart Doppler on my belly...no heat beat. Instant tears welled up in my eyes as I was processing everything. The shadowing medical student brought in the office ultrasound machine so that we could verify what I felt in my heart was already decided...but then...we saw a heartbeat! Praise the Lord!! An ultrasound appointment was schedule for 2pm in a nearby city (the only place that had an appointment available). We quickly found childcare for our first born and drove as calmly as we could to the appointment. Upon review of the ultrasound, I had placenta previa...more sever than the last pregnancy. However, they were not all the way sure as they also saw a subchorionic hematoma. This time I was told I could not lift, run, be on my feet, etc. for at least a full 7-days, until me next ultrasound appointment. They said something like, "Well, you might be miscarrying but for now we see a heartbeat." Well, at least there was a heartbeat! Over the next week, support flooded in and friends came over to lift my first born in and out of her crib, changer her diaper, prepare our meals. ((See original blog post here: unborn-fight-for-my-child) Our prayers were answered. Our darling second born....well, was born! No complications beyond those scary weeks in which we had no idea what was going to happen.
Pregnancy #3
Outcome: To be determined.
This pregnancy has been vastly, vastly different than the other two in more ways than one. First off, I was literally nauseated for the first 13-ish weeks. Thankfully I never threw up. At times I could only handle simple, bland foods. In someways that was great because it helped me keep my first trimester weight down. :) Yet with each passing week, approaching the 11.5 week mark, I was more and more worried. I had an early ultrasound around 8-weeks. The doctor called...the DOCTOR CALLED...with the results. Never a good sign, right? Well, I did (do)? have the same subchorionic hematoma (blood clot) as I had with pregnancy #2 but she did not seem at all concerned. She wanted to talk me through the results so I was not shocked or concerned when I saw the results posted online. I was thankful for her concern and explanation. Although it did put me at ease...it also made me worry. So, 11.5 weeks came and went with no bleeding. We went on our "babymoon" / family vacation yet with each passing week I grew anxious. What if I start bleeding again? Last week was my "victory" week 15. It came and went with no bleeding and now I am happy to say I am 16 weeks along...with NO bleeding. I am trying my best to turn my worry over to God but it is so hard. Honestly, though, who by worrying can add a single hour to the day? (Like 12:25). Lets say I do start bleeding....what really can I do? Life is in the hand of the Creator regardless of what I do or do not do. So, I am trying to rest in this amazing gift...this third pregnancy with no complications (as of yet).
There is a reason why the word "worry," in various forms, appears 365 times in the Bible. One verse for each day. So, I put my trust in Him who created all...big and small...in the One who is more concern about this precious life growing inside of me..more than I will ever know.
Thank you Jesus that You are the One we can put our trust and lay our worry down. You are Faithful at bringing us peace and hope and joy beyond measure.
~Amen~
That is my definition. Yes, I have been worried...somewhat secretly... about pregnancy #3.
It all stated with pregnancy #1...
Pregnancy #1
Outcome- successful: yet at week 15 I woke up to bloody sheets on a Tuesday morning. Initially I was in shock. I called my close friend and told her I would be a "little late" to bible study that morning because I had blood on my sheets and had to change the bedding. Then...it hit me. I was pregnant and bleeding. My husband, then in medical school, was up in Seattle without transportation because he took the commuter bus. I felt stuck. I called my mom; she rushed over and took me to the doctor and supported me during this crazy, crazy day. My husband finally found a way back home by our scheduled "emergency" ultrasound. I had placenta previa and was placed on modified bed rest for less than a week. My bleeding stopped soon after and the rest of my pregnancy was normal.
Pregnancy #2
Outcome-successful: yet at week 11.5, again on a Tuesday, I was at summer bible study. As I sat on the couch listening to the DVD on the book of Malachi, I felt like I was "leaking." I casually slide off the couch just a few minutes into the video and headed to the bathroom. It was a bloody mess! I was incredibly shocked to see that much blood. I froze. For sure I was having a miscarriage, I thought. As calmly as I could, I walked out, grabbed my phone without saying anything to the ladies in the room and headed back to the bathroom. They must have sensed something was wrong because my good friend, whose NEW leather couch I just bled all over, followed me back into the bathroom. Thankfully my husband was in town at the local dentist. I called the office and he rushed over in what felt like just minutes with new clothes, lots of pads and the direct route to the doctor's office. It felt like forever until we were called back. I explained the large amount of continual bleeding; and I was prepared in my heart that we lost our second child. The doctor placed the heart Doppler on my belly...no heat beat. Instant tears welled up in my eyes as I was processing everything. The shadowing medical student brought in the office ultrasound machine so that we could verify what I felt in my heart was already decided...but then...we saw a heartbeat! Praise the Lord!! An ultrasound appointment was schedule for 2pm in a nearby city (the only place that had an appointment available). We quickly found childcare for our first born and drove as calmly as we could to the appointment. Upon review of the ultrasound, I had placenta previa...more sever than the last pregnancy. However, they were not all the way sure as they also saw a subchorionic hematoma. This time I was told I could not lift, run, be on my feet, etc. for at least a full 7-days, until me next ultrasound appointment. They said something like, "Well, you might be miscarrying but for now we see a heartbeat." Well, at least there was a heartbeat! Over the next week, support flooded in and friends came over to lift my first born in and out of her crib, changer her diaper, prepare our meals. ((See original blog post here: unborn-fight-for-my-child) Our prayers were answered. Our darling second born....well, was born! No complications beyond those scary weeks in which we had no idea what was going to happen.
Pregnancy #3
Outcome: To be determined.
This pregnancy has been vastly, vastly different than the other two in more ways than one. First off, I was literally nauseated for the first 13-ish weeks. Thankfully I never threw up. At times I could only handle simple, bland foods. In someways that was great because it helped me keep my first trimester weight down. :) Yet with each passing week, approaching the 11.5 week mark, I was more and more worried. I had an early ultrasound around 8-weeks. The doctor called...the DOCTOR CALLED...with the results. Never a good sign, right? Well, I did (do)? have the same subchorionic hematoma (blood clot) as I had with pregnancy #2 but she did not seem at all concerned. She wanted to talk me through the results so I was not shocked or concerned when I saw the results posted online. I was thankful for her concern and explanation. Although it did put me at ease...it also made me worry. So, 11.5 weeks came and went with no bleeding. We went on our "babymoon" / family vacation yet with each passing week I grew anxious. What if I start bleeding again? Last week was my "victory" week 15. It came and went with no bleeding and now I am happy to say I am 16 weeks along...with NO bleeding. I am trying my best to turn my worry over to God but it is so hard. Honestly, though, who by worrying can add a single hour to the day? (Like 12:25). Lets say I do start bleeding....what really can I do? Life is in the hand of the Creator regardless of what I do or do not do. So, I am trying to rest in this amazing gift...this third pregnancy with no complications (as of yet).
There is a reason why the word "worry," in various forms, appears 365 times in the Bible. One verse for each day. So, I put my trust in Him who created all...big and small...in the One who is more concern about this precious life growing inside of me..more than I will ever know.
Thank you Jesus that You are the One we can put our trust and lay our worry down. You are Faithful at bringing us peace and hope and joy beyond measure.
~Amen~
Saturday, December 3, 2016
Pt. 2: When It Rains It Pours: The hardest season of life
The kids are down for the night. Husband is working late (until at least 1am). And I am drinking some peppermint tea in hopes of soothing my very sore and swollen throat. As I snuck in a shower, I began to reflect on my previous blog and all that this hard season is and has been teaching me...to be honest, something I have not done until just a few moments ago.
It is easy to complain about where God has us or just plain forget that God always has a plan. So, I am choosing to have a different attitude (...thanks for letting me vent in my past posting).
Trials, hard seasons, whatever you want to call them...they test us. I have found that four areas of my life have been testing quiet a lot in these past months:
1. My Faith: I wish I could say that I have been on my knees everyday petitioning to God about all the happenings in my life. I haven't. Who has time? (I cringe as I type that last question). I was so caught up in just surviving, especially this past month, that I have spent little to no time diving in the WORD myself. Conviction! I know that God is always with me and He guides my path everyday...I have seen glimpses of Him controlling my tongue or my attitude towards my kids or husband or making a way for me to get my grading done or prepare for my son's first birthday but it is sad that this, my faith, has not been my top priority. My faith in Jesus grounds me. Gives me peace. Gives me hope. Helps me put life into proper perspective. To serve others and look beyond what I consider "horrible" circumstances. I certainly have been failing this part of the "test" but I am thankful that His mercies renew everyday and that I love Jesus and He loves me without a checklist of dos and don'ts. Seriously, thank you Jesus!
2. My Marriage: Like ships passing in the night (or at the front door), I can certainly say that this is not the strongest point our marriage has ever seen. So many changes have happened (and will happen) in these months that it literally has felt like a bunch of mini-business interactions, logistics of getting life sorted out and taken care of. Date night has been nonexistent, minus last Monday when we went to the Banff Film Festival. We both have been sick, taking turns of course, and as a result, the other has willingly taken up the slack of the grocery shopping, laundry, child care, etc. Text messages have taken the place of most face-to-face conversations due to necessity of our schedules. When will life slow down? I am thankful for all of the pictures we have posted around our house of our great adventures, some local some aboard. They remind me of who we were as a couple, who I want us to be and all of the great qualities I love about the man I married nearly 7 years ago. We are certainly in it for the long haul. I am SO thankful to have him by myself and fighting for us just as hard as I am! This is not a test I will fail! :)
3. My Family: First, my children. What a blessing and joy they truly are. They both have such unique and amazing personalities that come out more and more everyday. It is a privilege to shepherd them and get a front row seat to view of every stage of development. Although I feel as though I have ages YEARS since having them due to sleepless nights and the worries that most parents have, I would not trade this journey in for anything. Being a mother to them, especially in this hard season, has taught me more about love, patience, respect and noticing the details. (Trust me, the love and patience things is a HUGE test with a 2-year old and an 11-month old who wants to chew on everything and destroy everything). It has offered me the new perspective of seeing these changes from their world's view instead of mine. It has allowed me to include them in the craziness of life as we deal with life and death, rearrange our house to accommodate a new baby brother or sister and to teach about giving as we sort through to get rid of toys/clothes/etc. It is a learning opportunity in which I can teach them both how to handle life's hard circumstances with grace. It is an opportunity to teach them about praying for those arounds them who might also be struggling with change and transition. Secondly, this hard season has tested the relationships we have with our immediate families. I am thankful for our immediate families who have so willingly taken the kids or sent text messages just to see how we are. It is a true testament to all those popular and well known says that we can lean on family in hard times. This is so true.
4. My Friends: In prior seasons, I have spent so much more time investing into friendships than I have in the past three months. I would arrange coffee or play dates, social gatherings or group events. I have been slacking in this area. Although my heart is craving this authentic one-on-one or group time with my closest friends, I just have not have the room in my mind to plan or take care of one more event. (But please, if you want to get together, please let me know!!!). A few friends in this particular season have really stepped up when our family needed it the most. (Literally) offering a shoulder to cry on, a good meal, or care for both of our kids so we could take care of the responsibilities that come with being an adult. Some friendships have been but aside with little to no interaction while others have seemingly survived with the occasional text message here or there. Despite the different seasons we (as humans) go through, often times our friendships go through seasons too. I must say that I have been so INCREDIBLY grateful for those who have personally invested their lives with our durning this hard season...who get it without having to ask questions or without needing an explanation for the reason I just might not seem "happy" on a particular day. It reminds me of Proverbs 18:24 "...but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." So for those of you who have done this for us, we are so, so grateful for your love and partnership as we share in this journey of life.
So there you have it...for now. I know there are many, MANY other areas of my life being tested (such as full-time-work vs. full-time-life balance and becoming a mother of three under three among other topics listed above), but for now, I rejoice! COME ON! It is Christmas time! A time when we get to focus of the miraculous gift of Baby Jesus...the amazing life Jesus lived and what He taught us through that life that carries on today. So, if you are facing a hard season: pray, focus on your marriage and those relationships that matter most. Learn to count your blessings and surround yourself with those who will willingly walk though life without...with no judgement or hesitation but but pure love, honesty and grace.
Peace be upon you, my friends.
It is easy to complain about where God has us or just plain forget that God always has a plan. So, I am choosing to have a different attitude (...thanks for letting me vent in my past posting).
Trials, hard seasons, whatever you want to call them...they test us. I have found that four areas of my life have been testing quiet a lot in these past months:
- My Faith
- My Marriage
- My Family
- My Friends
1. My Faith: I wish I could say that I have been on my knees everyday petitioning to God about all the happenings in my life. I haven't. Who has time? (I cringe as I type that last question). I was so caught up in just surviving, especially this past month, that I have spent little to no time diving in the WORD myself. Conviction! I know that God is always with me and He guides my path everyday...I have seen glimpses of Him controlling my tongue or my attitude towards my kids or husband or making a way for me to get my grading done or prepare for my son's first birthday but it is sad that this, my faith, has not been my top priority. My faith in Jesus grounds me. Gives me peace. Gives me hope. Helps me put life into proper perspective. To serve others and look beyond what I consider "horrible" circumstances. I certainly have been failing this part of the "test" but I am thankful that His mercies renew everyday and that I love Jesus and He loves me without a checklist of dos and don'ts. Seriously, thank you Jesus!
2. My Marriage: Like ships passing in the night (or at the front door), I can certainly say that this is not the strongest point our marriage has ever seen. So many changes have happened (and will happen) in these months that it literally has felt like a bunch of mini-business interactions, logistics of getting life sorted out and taken care of. Date night has been nonexistent, minus last Monday when we went to the Banff Film Festival. We both have been sick, taking turns of course, and as a result, the other has willingly taken up the slack of the grocery shopping, laundry, child care, etc. Text messages have taken the place of most face-to-face conversations due to necessity of our schedules. When will life slow down? I am thankful for all of the pictures we have posted around our house of our great adventures, some local some aboard. They remind me of who we were as a couple, who I want us to be and all of the great qualities I love about the man I married nearly 7 years ago. We are certainly in it for the long haul. I am SO thankful to have him by myself and fighting for us just as hard as I am! This is not a test I will fail! :)
3. My Family: First, my children. What a blessing and joy they truly are. They both have such unique and amazing personalities that come out more and more everyday. It is a privilege to shepherd them and get a front row seat to view of every stage of development. Although I feel as though I have ages YEARS since having them due to sleepless nights and the worries that most parents have, I would not trade this journey in for anything. Being a mother to them, especially in this hard season, has taught me more about love, patience, respect and noticing the details. (Trust me, the love and patience things is a HUGE test with a 2-year old and an 11-month old who wants to chew on everything and destroy everything). It has offered me the new perspective of seeing these changes from their world's view instead of mine. It has allowed me to include them in the craziness of life as we deal with life and death, rearrange our house to accommodate a new baby brother or sister and to teach about giving as we sort through to get rid of toys/clothes/etc. It is a learning opportunity in which I can teach them both how to handle life's hard circumstances with grace. It is an opportunity to teach them about praying for those arounds them who might also be struggling with change and transition. Secondly, this hard season has tested the relationships we have with our immediate families. I am thankful for our immediate families who have so willingly taken the kids or sent text messages just to see how we are. It is a true testament to all those popular and well known says that we can lean on family in hard times. This is so true.
4. My Friends: In prior seasons, I have spent so much more time investing into friendships than I have in the past three months. I would arrange coffee or play dates, social gatherings or group events. I have been slacking in this area. Although my heart is craving this authentic one-on-one or group time with my closest friends, I just have not have the room in my mind to plan or take care of one more event. (But please, if you want to get together, please let me know!!!). A few friends in this particular season have really stepped up when our family needed it the most. (Literally) offering a shoulder to cry on, a good meal, or care for both of our kids so we could take care of the responsibilities that come with being an adult. Some friendships have been but aside with little to no interaction while others have seemingly survived with the occasional text message here or there. Despite the different seasons we (as humans) go through, often times our friendships go through seasons too. I must say that I have been so INCREDIBLY grateful for those who have personally invested their lives with our durning this hard season...who get it without having to ask questions or without needing an explanation for the reason I just might not seem "happy" on a particular day. It reminds me of Proverbs 18:24 "...but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." So for those of you who have done this for us, we are so, so grateful for your love and partnership as we share in this journey of life.
So there you have it...for now. I know there are many, MANY other areas of my life being tested (such as full-time-work vs. full-time-life balance and becoming a mother of three under three among other topics listed above), but for now, I rejoice! COME ON! It is Christmas time! A time when we get to focus of the miraculous gift of Baby Jesus...the amazing life Jesus lived and what He taught us through that life that carries on today. So, if you are facing a hard season: pray, focus on your marriage and those relationships that matter most. Learn to count your blessings and surround yourself with those who will willingly walk though life without...with no judgement or hesitation but but pure love, honesty and grace.
Peace be upon you, my friends.
When It Rains It Pours: The hardest season of life
You have heard the saying, "when it rains it pours." Well, that is the most accurate description of my life right now. Let me explain...
It all started in late August when we were surprised with the news of baby #3. In many ways it was an answer to our prayers because we were truly undecided if we should have a third. Well, God answered that for us and in His perfect timing. Literally at day one of this pregnancy I felt nauseous...immediately I knew I was pregnant.
The month quickly transitioned from summer to fall which is a season of new beginnings and lots of planning. After having almost 3 months off of teaching, I was thrusted into the full swing of teaching 4 university level courses in addition to being a full-time stay at home mom...pregnant again with non-stop nausea. Fun. With the husband working mostly afternoon into evening shifts that left me feeding, bathing and putting our VERY two-years-old and 10-month old to sleep most nights. Talk about exhausting. I will confess that I made way too much mac & cheese or fish sticks for dinner. Mom of the year award for frozen & processed foods! When I had just my daughter I would have NEVER DREAMED of giving her these types of foods. Sorry son. To top the craziest of our September begins, both my husband & I are bible study leaders. Yea, way to add one more thing! Oh and did I mention that our 10-month old son still gets up 2-4 times a night. Boy, let me tell you how refreshed I am in the morning.
October started off fine. We were finding our balance as a family and I was learning how to manage my nausea along with my million other responsibilities. We began the "big bedroom move" which consisted of combining offices (down to one shared desk between my husband and I...so far so good), purging my clothing to combine two closest into one tiny shared closet with my hubby and cleaning out our back room in preparation to move our son downstairs so that the current nursery could be re-done for baby 3. As we slowly made progress, my nausea began to subside and life felt like it was getting back to normal....until we woke up mid-October to many text messages and phone calls sent during the night. Tyler's mother had passed away.
It shouldn't have been as much as a shock as it was. In early September, the family made the decision to put her on hospice care. She had a saddle pulmonary embolism over three years prior which left her bed bound and unable to retain most of her short-term memory. Regardless of her condition, it is never easy when a family member passes (expected or not). So, just as we felt our life normalizing, we were in the throughs of dealing with cremation and memorial planning. Her death brought up a lot of memories from my husband's childhood, some good, some bad. It took roughly two weeks for things to settle...at least for most of the logistics to be taken care of (we are still dealing with some minor items from her estate). Before we knew it November had arrived. The month that we had been planning for since June.
Back in June we has decided to plan a family trip to Maui to support my husband's required continuing medical education. He found a great conference in Maui which would allow him to get the knowledge and CME credits he needed as well as a great opportunity to spend some family time together. This trip occurred just two weeks after his mom died. In addition to preparing for her memorial, we were packing our bags to fly to Hawaii. Talk about mixed emotions and WAY too much planning for such a short timeframe. We made it though, our bags packed and kids prepared. We arrived at the airport that first week in November with plenty of time to check our bags and find our gate. When we finally boarded at 10am, we learned there was an engine problem. Grounded, on the plane with two kids, for an hour! They fixed the problem. We all found our seats again and we eagerly awaited takeoff. Forty-five minutes into our flight... over the Pacific Ocean... the engine problem reoccurred. We had no choice but to fly back to the airport so that they could fix the plane. Long story short, our plane ended up not taking off until 1:45AM...talk about a "slight" delay. It felt relentless especially after all of the stress leading up to this trip. I wish I could say that our trip got better but it didn't. Both kids got sick (as well as my husband) and our boy decided that it was the perfect time to cut teeth. In addition, our two-year decided to become two on this trip...you know the "NO! I do it! No help please! MY TURN" kinda two. She had NEVER acted like this until Hawaii. Needless to say, everyday was a battle. The husband left at 7am to return at 1pm Monday-Friday for his conference. I was literally done dealing with the kids and my nausea by the time he made it back to the condo. My son not sleeping through the night (waking 3-5 times was slightly obnoxious too)...so here we were in tropical paradise struggling to embrace this so-called "vacation." To be honest, we almost left 4-days early but decided to stick it out. Overall, we were glad that we went for those few and far between fun memories we made but it certainly was not relaxing and we did not come back tan!
The day after we got back, I jumped right back into my role as Relay Center Coordinator for Operation Christmas Child. I coordinate a team of volunteers every year to help collect shoebox gifts that are sent around the world. It is a great project but a lot of work to organize. I was exhausted with little rest but really, what are you going to do? The day after was my families Thanksgiving which involved shopping and preparing a few side dishes for the festivities...seriously...one thing after another after another. We enjoyed the gathering and the food but were thankful to come home and rest once the evening was done. The following week was real Thanksgiving. We were glad to purchase our side dish and bring it instead of making it from scratch.
Thanksgiving has always been a great time of year for my family and a stepping stone to Christmas. Which this year seemed to approach quicker than any other year due to the craziness of life.....OH YEA! And our son's first birthday! December has started off trying to catch up....decorating, buying gifts, planning my son's first birthday party, planning a gender reveal party for the end of the month for baby 3, finishing our "big bedroom move"...did I mention I started this month off being sick? Knock down, don't touch me or talk to me sick? Just one more thing. I am praying that the craziness of this life's season will pass quickly while trying to embrace the great memories in between but it sure has been hard to remain upbeat, positive and mentally together dealing with all of these challenges.
I guess the saying is right, when it rains it pours!
PS- when my husband got into his car today to drive to his 12-hour shift...he sat on a bee and got stung... IN DECEMBER!! Seriously, Lord, please have mercy on us.
It all started in late August when we were surprised with the news of baby #3. In many ways it was an answer to our prayers because we were truly undecided if we should have a third. Well, God answered that for us and in His perfect timing. Literally at day one of this pregnancy I felt nauseous...immediately I knew I was pregnant.
The month quickly transitioned from summer to fall which is a season of new beginnings and lots of planning. After having almost 3 months off of teaching, I was thrusted into the full swing of teaching 4 university level courses in addition to being a full-time stay at home mom...pregnant again with non-stop nausea. Fun. With the husband working mostly afternoon into evening shifts that left me feeding, bathing and putting our VERY two-years-old and 10-month old to sleep most nights. Talk about exhausting. I will confess that I made way too much mac & cheese or fish sticks for dinner. Mom of the year award for frozen & processed foods! When I had just my daughter I would have NEVER DREAMED of giving her these types of foods. Sorry son. To top the craziest of our September begins, both my husband & I are bible study leaders. Yea, way to add one more thing! Oh and did I mention that our 10-month old son still gets up 2-4 times a night. Boy, let me tell you how refreshed I am in the morning.
October started off fine. We were finding our balance as a family and I was learning how to manage my nausea along with my million other responsibilities. We began the "big bedroom move" which consisted of combining offices (down to one shared desk between my husband and I...so far so good), purging my clothing to combine two closest into one tiny shared closet with my hubby and cleaning out our back room in preparation to move our son downstairs so that the current nursery could be re-done for baby 3. As we slowly made progress, my nausea began to subside and life felt like it was getting back to normal....until we woke up mid-October to many text messages and phone calls sent during the night. Tyler's mother had passed away.
It shouldn't have been as much as a shock as it was. In early September, the family made the decision to put her on hospice care. She had a saddle pulmonary embolism over three years prior which left her bed bound and unable to retain most of her short-term memory. Regardless of her condition, it is never easy when a family member passes (expected or not). So, just as we felt our life normalizing, we were in the throughs of dealing with cremation and memorial planning. Her death brought up a lot of memories from my husband's childhood, some good, some bad. It took roughly two weeks for things to settle...at least for most of the logistics to be taken care of (we are still dealing with some minor items from her estate). Before we knew it November had arrived. The month that we had been planning for since June.
Back in June we has decided to plan a family trip to Maui to support my husband's required continuing medical education. He found a great conference in Maui which would allow him to get the knowledge and CME credits he needed as well as a great opportunity to spend some family time together. This trip occurred just two weeks after his mom died. In addition to preparing for her memorial, we were packing our bags to fly to Hawaii. Talk about mixed emotions and WAY too much planning for such a short timeframe. We made it though, our bags packed and kids prepared. We arrived at the airport that first week in November with plenty of time to check our bags and find our gate. When we finally boarded at 10am, we learned there was an engine problem. Grounded, on the plane with two kids, for an hour! They fixed the problem. We all found our seats again and we eagerly awaited takeoff. Forty-five minutes into our flight... over the Pacific Ocean... the engine problem reoccurred. We had no choice but to fly back to the airport so that they could fix the plane. Long story short, our plane ended up not taking off until 1:45AM...talk about a "slight" delay. It felt relentless especially after all of the stress leading up to this trip. I wish I could say that our trip got better but it didn't. Both kids got sick (as well as my husband) and our boy decided that it was the perfect time to cut teeth. In addition, our two-year decided to become two on this trip...you know the "NO! I do it! No help please! MY TURN" kinda two. She had NEVER acted like this until Hawaii. Needless to say, everyday was a battle. The husband left at 7am to return at 1pm Monday-Friday for his conference. I was literally done dealing with the kids and my nausea by the time he made it back to the condo. My son not sleeping through the night (waking 3-5 times was slightly obnoxious too)...so here we were in tropical paradise struggling to embrace this so-called "vacation." To be honest, we almost left 4-days early but decided to stick it out. Overall, we were glad that we went for those few and far between fun memories we made but it certainly was not relaxing and we did not come back tan!
The day after we got back, I jumped right back into my role as Relay Center Coordinator for Operation Christmas Child. I coordinate a team of volunteers every year to help collect shoebox gifts that are sent around the world. It is a great project but a lot of work to organize. I was exhausted with little rest but really, what are you going to do? The day after was my families Thanksgiving which involved shopping and preparing a few side dishes for the festivities...seriously...one thing after another after another. We enjoyed the gathering and the food but were thankful to come home and rest once the evening was done. The following week was real Thanksgiving. We were glad to purchase our side dish and bring it instead of making it from scratch.
Thanksgiving has always been a great time of year for my family and a stepping stone to Christmas. Which this year seemed to approach quicker than any other year due to the craziness of life.....OH YEA! And our son's first birthday! December has started off trying to catch up....decorating, buying gifts, planning my son's first birthday party, planning a gender reveal party for the end of the month for baby 3, finishing our "big bedroom move"...did I mention I started this month off being sick? Knock down, don't touch me or talk to me sick? Just one more thing. I am praying that the craziness of this life's season will pass quickly while trying to embrace the great memories in between but it sure has been hard to remain upbeat, positive and mentally together dealing with all of these challenges.
I guess the saying is right, when it rains it pours!
PS- when my husband got into his car today to drive to his 12-hour shift...he sat on a bee and got stung... IN DECEMBER!! Seriously, Lord, please have mercy on us.
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