A thousand prayer were answered when I held me sweet little girl in my arms for the very first time. My heart opened up in ways I never imagined possible. My whole life changed and continues to change as she grows into a beautiful little girl.
Although she is only 7 months old, there were many days and nights and moments I surely took for granted. Those moments of cuddling in the morning before the sleep was out of her eyes. The tender, intimacy of being able to feed her at my breast. The joy of seeing many of her "firsts" during the first few months of her time here on earth. Watching her play with her first tooth by moving her tongue back and forth over it.
What a privilege and honor to be part of all these moments.
There were other moments not so amazing: crying throughout the night, being spit-up on constantly during the day, not having a clue as to what to do with this little human. Is she getting enough sleep? Is she eating enough? Is her schedule working? When do I feed her "real" food? And on and on.
At times I wished those hard, complicated moments away, desiring peace, calmness and a knowledge of how to be a better mom to this little girl I was entrusted with. I would ask for prayer (especially for those sleepless nights). I would complain. I sighed. I secretly wished to escape.
Many who have gone before me assured me that "This too shall pass."
I hung onto those words like a life-raft. I desperately needed relief...I waited for it. Looked for it. Hoped it would come so that I could move on to the next thing...the next BETTER thing. "This too shall pass."
I woke up this morning at 1 AM to the cries of my daughter to realize that is has been weeks since this has happened. Then is dawned on me as I laid there waiting for my daughter to soother herself back to sleep.....all those moments I wanted to pass have passed...and now they are gone. Forever. Regret slowly washed over me and I prayed to the Lord for forgiveness. Why did I wish those complicated moments away? Why was I so eager to move on?
My daughter will never go through those exact struggles again. She will never need me in the exact same way she did when she was an infant. Those moments I wished would pass, passed all to quickly. This reminded me of how fragile life is; the short amount of time we have here on earth; the importance of the good and difficult times; the need to live in the moment rather than wishing it away.
I pray you will be encouraged to live life in the moments that are give because, as I have learned, these moments too shall pass...and all too quickly.
